One of “those” days April 1, 2022

Psalm 119:81-88 ESV - Kaph
81 My soul longs for your salvation; I hope in your word. 
82 My eyes long for your promise; I ask, "When will you comfort me?" 
83 For I have become like a wineskin in the smoke, yet I have not forgotten your statutes. 
84 How long must your servant endure? When will you judge those who persecute me? 
85 The insolent have dug pitfalls for me; they do not live according to your law. 
86 All your commandments are sure; they persecute me with falsehood; help me! 
87 They have almost made an end of me on earth, but I have not forsaken your precepts. 
88 In your steadfast love give me life, that I may keep the testimonies of your mouth.

This is one of those days when I am so grateful for God’s Word, and so in awe of God’s mercy in urging me to “store up [His] word in my heart, that I might not sin against [God]” 119:11. I didn’t sleep well last night. My body does not fare well with barometric pressure changes (or temperature changes or days that end in ‘y’). I won’t waste your time with details; suffice it to say that “rest and regenerate” was just not there . . .

This stanza wasn’t even on today’s praying through the psalms list, but it is currently the stanza I am memorizing. As I wrote earlier this morning, I am in awe of such a great Savior. We don’t even deserve “one way” of reconciliation with a Holy God. I am assured of being His child, and that my true home is in heaven. That is a sure hope, and I find that assurance in God’s Word.

That’s the future. My whole body is miserable now. My eyes long for the promise of comfort. I don’t ask ‘why’ anymore (that question has been answered); but ‘how long’ still comes up from time to time . . .

“like a wineskin in the smoke” — not being consumed by a flame, but smoldering . . .this is an exposition by C.H. Spurgeon

For I am become like a bottle in the smoke.” The skins used for containing wine, when emptied, were hung up in the tent, and when the place reeked with smoke the skins grew black and sooty, and in the heat they became wrinkled and worn. The Psalmist’s face through sorrow had become dark and dismal, furrowed and lined; indeed, his whole body had so sympathized with his sorrowing mind as to have lost its natural moisture, and to have become like a skin dried and tanned. His character had been smoked with slander, and his mind parched with persecution; he was half afraid that he would become useless and incapable through so much mental suffering, and that men would look upon him as an old worn out skin bottle, which could hold nothing and answer no purpose. What a metaphor for a man to use who was certainly a poet, a divine, and a master in Israel, if not a king, and a man after God’s own heart! It is little wonder if we, commoner folk, are made to think very little of ourselves, and are filled with distress of mind. Some of us know the inner meaning of this simile, for we, too, have felt dinghy, mean, and worthless, only fit to be cast away. Very black and hot has been the smoke which has enveloped us; it seemed to come not alone from the Egyptian furnace, but from the bottomless pit; and it had a clinging power which made the soot of it fasten upon us and blacken us with miserable thoughts.

Treasury of David, by C. H. Spurgeon

And yet . . . “I have not forgotten your statutes” and “all your commandments are sure” and “I have not forgotten your precepts.” Feeling not comforted or asking how long is not necessarily a lack of faith; sometimes it’s a cry for help (notice v. 86)

Despite the lack of sleep, the swollen joints, the nerve pain, the partial blindness, (to name a few) psalm 86a and 88 are how God does give me a certain hope and actually does comfort and help me. His commandments are sure. His steadfast love gives me life. God means for me to not only keep the testimonies of His mouth but also to tell of how He is enough; His Word is sufficient. He is God. He is my Father. I have a sure hope and an eternal home with Him

Psalm 119:73-77 ESV – 73 Your hands have made and fashioned me; give me understanding that I may learn your commandments. 74 Those who fear you shall see me and rejoice, because I have hoped in your word. 75 I know, O LORD, that your rules are righteous, and that in faithfulness you have afflicted me. 76 Let your steadfast love comfort me according to your promise to your servant. 77 Let your mercy come to me, that I may live; for your law is my delight.